Gay Adoption: True stories (from The Independent)
The Catholic church should be allowed to deny same-sex couples the right to adopt. So says Cardinal Cormac Murphy-O’Connor. Kate Hilpern, who helps to place children in new homes, and was adopted herself, explains why he’s wrong. And five gay parents share their experiences of bringing up a family
It takes guts to apply to adopt children knowing that your life is about to be closely scrutinised. If you’re a lesbian or gay individual or couple, that bravery is all the greater. I’ve heard countless stories from those I’ve worked with in the field of adoption of lengthy and disheartening struggles, of overt discrimination. And I know first-hand, from seven years’ service on a local authority adoption panel, that some adoption workers reveal inadvertent prejudices even when they’d be horrified at the thought of being considered anything other than liberal.
If the individual or couple is fortunate enough to make it through the adoption process, this is often just the beginning. Out in the world of mother-and-baby groups and school runs, they face at best, endless intrigue, and at worst, additional bigotry and intolerance.
Little wonder that many lesbian couples take to the turkey baster instead, although, of course, men have fewer options when it comes to starting a family. For those that do weather the adoption journey (and interestingly, there are as many female couples as male), the level of dedication required clearly comes from one overriding wish: to give children a good experience of care. Indeed, lesbian and gay people disproportionately adopt those hardest to place, including older children, children with disabilities and children with emotional difficulties. It is also the case that these adoptions rarely break down, and there is evidence of healthy and happy outcomes for the children.
